Choosing to foster is a big decision, so it’s normal to have lots of questions about what it involves.
We’ve answered the most frequently asked questions from prospective foster carers, to help you make an informed decision.
Choosing to foster is a big decision, so it’s normal to have lots of questions about what it involves.
We’ve answered the most frequently asked questions from prospective foster carers, to help you make an informed decision.
Fostering and adoption are very different things, although both involve looking after a child.
Fostering involves offering children a home while their own family is unable to look after them. It can be a temporary arrangement, and many children who are fostered return to their own families. Some children who cannot return home may live in long-term foster care and will stay in touch with their families, often with continued support from the local authority or health and social care trust. Foster carers never have parental responsibility for a child in their care.
Adoption involves providing a new family for children who cannot be brought up by their own families. It’s a legal procedure in which parental responsibility is transferred from the “birth parents” to the adopters. This means an adopted child loses all legal ties to their “birth parents” and becomes a full member of the new family, usually taking the family’s name. Once an adoption order has been granted it can't be reversed except in extremely rare circumstances.
It is important to think very carefully about whether fostering or adoption is right for you.
If you’re asking yourself whether you could be a foster carer, the answer is most likely to be ‘Yes!’
There are a few specific criteria that foster carers should meet, such as being at least 18 years old, and living in the UK – but even if you don’t meet all of these, it’s worth having a conversation with the fostering service you would like to join. There are lots of factors that fostering services will explore to help them decide who can provide the best care for a child. For example, if you don't have a spare room, you might still be able to provide short break care or foster a very young child.
There are many myths around who can foster, so people sometimes rule themselves out of fostering unnecessarily. You can be a foster carer without having any specific qualifications, and you don't need to have children of your own. Having pets, practicing a religion, speaking English as a second language or being in a same-sex relationship will also not prevent you from fostering. What's important is that you can support, nurture and care for children who cannot live with their own families.
All prospective foster carers will go through an assessment process before they are approved as foster carers. As part of this assessment, you,ill usually discuss the number and age of children you may wish to be approved to foster, and any other considerations (for example, the number and age of your own children, your health, and the suitability of your home). Ideally, all foster carers and the children they look after, will be well-matched, to make the fostering arrangement as successful as possible. However, a foster carer has the right to turn down a proposed fostering arrangement if they don’t feel it is appropriate for them.
Once you are approved as a foster carer, it is inevitable that there will be some children who will fit in better with your family circumstances than others. Some children may take time to adjust to living in your home. However, if there is a real problem with the fostering arrangement, then it is important to discuss this with your social worker. You may find if things are not working out for you, the child will also be feeling that this is not the right place for them.
It may be that with extra support or training and time, the child will settle but it is important to share any concerns with your social worker. Sometimes, it may be decided that it is best if the child moves to another foster family. Find out more about being a foster carer.
Fostering involves the whole family, so it is important that all children living in the home are involved in the process. Some children can find it tough to 'share’ their parents with children who have led very different lives. Others enjoy having more children around and gain a lot from the fostering experience. Your children should be included in all stages of the fostering process, so you can consider their wishes and feelings.
Experienced foster carers tell us it’s important to continue making time for your own children to ensure they contninue to feel secure in their relationship with you. Research suggests that it is also preferable to have a reasonable age gap – either way – between your children and those you foster. Some fostering services run specific support groups for children of foster carers.
Yes! All foster carers receive a weekly fostering allowance intended to cover the costs of looking after a child, such as clothing, food and pocket money. Each fostering service sets its own allowance levels, and the amount varies depending on the age of the child. Some foster carers may also receive fees (on top of the allowance) for their time, skills and experience. Read more about your finances as a foster carer.
Depending on the needs and age of the children you care for, it may be possible to work full-time alongside your fostering. But it is more common for foster carers to work part-time, particularly if they’re caring for school-age children. This is because foster carers are expected to be available to care for children, attend meetings, training, support groups, and to promote and support 'family time' between a child and their relatives. It is not usually appropriate for a child to be in full-time daycare while their foster carer works, although fostering services may accept the use of after-school clubs and other childcare arrangements for older children. It’s a good idea to check if your fostering service has a policy about foster carers working alongside fostering.
Do you still have a question about fostering? Contact our Advice Lines to speak to one of our professional, friendly advisers or find out more about fostering, below.